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Noah Cyrus 'lost all hope, strength and faith' when she was in the grips of an addiction to 'downers, prescription pills, painkillers and Xanax'.
The singer and actress, 22, who is the younger sister of Miley Cyrus, told how she was 'completely wrapped inside of that drug [Xanax], before suffering a 'breakdown' which led to her seeking help with her addiction and mental health issues.
The musician explained her new album, The Hardest Part, was inspired by her struggles and 'exhausting' battle with addiction, which came to a head in late 2020.
Insightful: Noah Cyrus 'lost all hope, strength and faith' when she was in the grips of an addiction to 'downers, prescription pills, painkillers and Xanax'
Speaking in an interview with Zane Lowe on Apple Music 1, she said: 'This album came about at a time where I had a lot of change in my life.
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'At the end of December 2020 is when I decided to try and kick my addiction to downers, prescription pills, painkillers, Xanax. That was kind of my drug of choice. And I was completely wrapped inside of that drug.
'And when I had just lost all hope and all faith and all strength to keep going is when I just broke down and asked for help. Where for so long, I had been denying, denying, denying, and pushing away, where I finally just said, "I cannot lie to you anymore".'
Noah explained her road to recovery started with a phone call to her therapist who helped her realise that she needed help with her struggles.
Tough time: The singer and actress who is the younger sister of Miley Cyrus, told how she was 'completely wrapped inside of that drug [Xanax], before suffering a 'breakdown'
She explained: 'I called my therapist. I called my psychiatrist. And I think there was a lot of confusion that a lot of things clicked for them where a lot of stories hadn't made sense in the past.
'A lot of things were clicking and I got the help that I needed and also that I deserve and that every person with addiction or mental health deserves. And then around that time, I met a new manager.
'He's a huge component in me and my happiness today, genuinely. And you don't get to say that a lot. I genuinely mean that.
'I feel like for the first time in my career, I'm really being thought after and looked after and my wellbeing and who I am. Who I am personally and not as the artist.'
Admitting that she was 'exhausted all the time' in the depths of her addiction, Noah added that it's been 'hard' to find the energy to work on her mental health.
Ordeal: The musician explained her new album, The Hardest Part, was inspired by her struggles and 'exhausting' battle with addiction, which came to a head in late 2020
She told Zane: 'I didn't have the energy to create. I didn't have the energy to put truth or I was always writing.
'I think that's one thing that's always stayed the same with me is how truthful I've been and honest I've been about what's going on inside and my mental health.
'I mean with my fans, I'm really straight up about my mental health and growing up, how that's been hard for me in the public eye.
'But yeah, I mean I don't know. I got to put a lot of it into my music and I've always been really truthful with that and meeting people that brought that out of me.'
Noah went onto say that at her lowest ebb, she 'didn't want to be alive anymore,' because she felt the prospect of living was 'really painful.'
She continued: 'There's a lot of personal things that I had to come to terms with. I've acknowledged it and I'm definitely healing it. But I think also at the time, I did not want to be alive anymore. I didn't.
Advice: Noah explained her road to recovery started with a phone call to her therapist who helped her realise that she needed help with her struggles
'And I was just waiting for one day that maybe I wouldn't wake up. I don't know where it was heading. There were a lot of scary moments.
'I just know that I was trying to avoid being alive or maybe feeling the feeling of being alive because sometimes being alive is really painful.
'Looping back to where I'm at right this second is something that if I have experienced this feeling and this life before being not easy, life's not easy for anyone.
'Everybody's life is custom to them and their pain is custom and their heartache is custom, but either it's the first time or the first time in a very freaking long time that I have felt this feeling in myself of just peaceful happiness and just living day by day and going to sleep not hoping that I won't wake up.'
Tough time: She said that at her lowest ebb, she 'didn't want to be alive anymore,' because she felt the prospect of living was 'really painful'
Noah went onto urge other listeners to seek help if they feel that they are struggling, telling Zane: 'The conversation alone, life saving, the conversation. I know that some people aren't as lucky to get the resources that some of us may have as in psychiatrists and therapy.
'I understand and it pains me that not every single person has that access, because I think it's extremely important. But there are ways online, numbers you can call, hotlines, conversations, people in your life.
'If you're a younger child in school, an adult in school, a doctor, somebody that you actually trust. If you don't trust anyone in your family, if you trust somebody else, talk to them. That's okay.
'It's okay to not trust people close to you if that's just how you feel. How you feel is how you feel. But open up the conversation to anyone just to get those feelings moving and to get somewhere, just to start somewhere. I'm so happy to be here.'
Progress: Having overcome her breakdown and drug addiction, Noah told Zane that she is now focused on moving ahead and releasing her upcoming album
Having overcome her breakdown and drug addiction, Noah told Zane that she is now focused on moving ahead and releasing her upcoming album.
'You know what? I think you met me right before I lost who I was. I was still a kid, but I forgot who I was for a really long time,' she said.
'And I think moving forward is also, for me personally, which I think you were asking that also musically, but for me personally, now I'm making peace with that person that went through everything in the past three, four years.
'I had to make peace with other things to get to where I am now. And now I have to make peace with who I was back then.
'I want to create music that's on my own terms and art that's on my own terms and whoever's on board with it, I love it. And I love that.
'They love my music and I love that they love to sing, but I'm not going to conform to anything ever again. I just want to be myself. I just want to write music. I love music. I love writing songs.'
Revelation: Noah previously detailed her Xanax addiction during an interview with Rolling Stone in July, said that she initially tried the drug at the age of 18
Noah previously detailed her Xanax addiction during an interview with Rolling Stone in July, said that she initially tried the drug at the age of 18, a time she was 'surrounded by people' who provided her with access to the narcotic.
'My boyfriend at the time, when I was 18, was the first person that gave me a Xanax, and it became a way for us to bond,' the Nashville-born vocalist told the outlet. 'I think I wanted to fit in with him.
She continued: 'I wanted to be what he wanted and what he thought was cool and what I thought everybody was doing. Once I felt that it was possible to silence things out for a second and numb your pain, it was over.'
Former flame: Miley did not specifically name her ex who she began using the drug with, but she was in a high-profile relationship with rapper Lil Xan in 2018 (pictured at the time)
Read more:
_The Zane Lowe Show on Apple Music
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